Hey, guys!
I've started a new blog:
madicscruggs.blogspot.com
It's cleaner, more sophisticated, and a whole lot more wonderful. No longer am I Cooper Calamity (the really odd nickname I held on to for a while), but fully, wholeheartedly me.
Follow me by email on this new blog or however you want to follow me, because I promise that I'm going to make a schedule for posting and never miss a beat. All of my videos will be posted the day they're up on YouTube, and I'll try to post more about movies, writing, my family, and more.
It's a new chapter of my life, so hop on board!
Showing posts with label college. Show all posts
Going home for the weekend.
Thursday, November 1, 2012 § 0
Something I've struggled with a lot as a college student is the notion of going home for the weekend. Social cues and media examples always show how teenagers are supposed to hate their parents and, once they fly the coop, never want to come home again. This, I say, is ridiculous.
I love my parents. My sister is my best friend. This is why last year, when I spent over three months at a time away from the people that I loved the most (I was in Colorado for school, my family in Texas- such is the life for any out-of-state student) it was a wake-up call for me, but a much needed one. I learned how to live by myself and I made a few close friends and basically, just kept myself busy. I got a job at the newspaper. I got involved around campus. I learned to love my school.
Now, though, it's so much different. My parents are here, and the friends I choose to spend time with these days are few and far between (don't pity me- I'm not spending my nights curled up on my bed alone, crying myself to sleep out of loneliness. I've got my people but just not as many as I would prefer). My weekends are a little bare, so lately, I've been taking the 2 hour trip between FoCo and Parker and using the weekends to spend time with my family.
I do this a lot, and one weekend, it really got to me. I stayed in my apartment and when my mom urged me to come spend the day with her and the family just for a Sunday, I felt wrong. I looked back on all the interactions I'd ever had with friends where they mentioned how terrible it was to constantly head home on the weekends, and what was 'normal' and 'right' and 'good'. Needless to say, I got in my own head.
This weekend, I may stay and I may go, the choice is kind of up in the air. But the fact of the matter is- I realized that the only person who really cares how often I go home on the weekends or not is me. I need to stop judging myself for things that, in the end, don't really matter at all. So I want to spent time with my family. Big whoop. I may be lame and the most nontraditional college student in the world for that reason but honestly, I don't really care.
This uncaring attitude of mine may not last for long and I may go back to my old ways of constantly self-judging, but the fact of the matter is is that right now I need to realize that nothing in today's society should be considered 'normal' or 'right'. Everyone is different and no one has the exact same college experience. Some people go home on the weekends, and some people party until their brain hurts.
And you know what? I'm going to do both.
I love my parents. My sister is my best friend. This is why last year, when I spent over three months at a time away from the people that I loved the most (I was in Colorado for school, my family in Texas- such is the life for any out-of-state student) it was a wake-up call for me, but a much needed one. I learned how to live by myself and I made a few close friends and basically, just kept myself busy. I got a job at the newspaper. I got involved around campus. I learned to love my school.
Now, though, it's so much different. My parents are here, and the friends I choose to spend time with these days are few and far between (don't pity me- I'm not spending my nights curled up on my bed alone, crying myself to sleep out of loneliness. I've got my people but just not as many as I would prefer). My weekends are a little bare, so lately, I've been taking the 2 hour trip between FoCo and Parker and using the weekends to spend time with my family.
I do this a lot, and one weekend, it really got to me. I stayed in my apartment and when my mom urged me to come spend the day with her and the family just for a Sunday, I felt wrong. I looked back on all the interactions I'd ever had with friends where they mentioned how terrible it was to constantly head home on the weekends, and what was 'normal' and 'right' and 'good'. Needless to say, I got in my own head.
This weekend, I may stay and I may go, the choice is kind of up in the air. But the fact of the matter is- I realized that the only person who really cares how often I go home on the weekends or not is me. I need to stop judging myself for things that, in the end, don't really matter at all. So I want to spent time with my family. Big whoop. I may be lame and the most nontraditional college student in the world for that reason but honestly, I don't really care.
This uncaring attitude of mine may not last for long and I may go back to my old ways of constantly self-judging, but the fact of the matter is is that right now I need to realize that nothing in today's society should be considered 'normal' or 'right'. Everyone is different and no one has the exact same college experience. Some people go home on the weekends, and some people party until their brain hurts.
And you know what? I'm going to do both.
This week.
Wednesday, August 29, 2012 § 0
Wow. This week has been intense and stressful and emotionally exhausting!
First of all, there's the fact that Obama came to my university yesterday and I didn't get to see him because I had to work (whine whine whine, I know...but whether you like him or not, who wouldn't want to see the POTUS in person??)
And then there's my first foray into dating. There's a guy that's into me but I really just want to be friends...and I've never had to deal with anything like this before. There's gonna be some feelings hurt and I may lose this guy as a pal....UGH I'M SO BAD AT BOYS.
And, of course, the clincher- it's finally time to say goodbye to Yunioshi:
First of all, there's the fact that Obama came to my university yesterday and I didn't get to see him because I had to work (whine whine whine, I know...but whether you like him or not, who wouldn't want to see the POTUS in person??)
And then there's my first foray into dating. There's a guy that's into me but I really just want to be friends...and I've never had to deal with anything like this before. There's gonna be some feelings hurt and I may lose this guy as a pal....UGH I'M SO BAD AT BOYS.
And, of course, the clincher- it's finally time to say goodbye to Yunioshi:
(not my picture. I honestly can't believe I couldn't find any personal pictures of my beloved vehicle)
After 3 wonderful years, my car has decided to act up and generally become a huge douche. For example, Yuni broke down in a turn lane a while back, almost in the middle of an intersection, and I was stuck there, crying and trying to turn him back on and getting nothing from my efforts. It was sad. There are other things, too- like a constant smell of gas (inside the car), strange lights coming on...etc, etc. I would definitely try harder to keep little Yuni around but the job I have requires that I have to pick up kids from school, and I don't think Yuni's reliable enough. Therefore, I'm using my own money to get another sweet-ass ride (stressful). It's gonna be hard to say goodbye to this baby.
So it's been quite a week, and I think I'm getting mild anxiety, because any time I even think about having to deal with any one of these things while also juggling homework and a double major, I generally start freaking out. Seriously, I need to take up yoga or something.
Until later,
Madi
The apartment.
Sunday, August 19, 2012 § 0
Can't believe I went from dorm life:
To apartment life:
So QUICKLY! I look at all the freshman wandering around campus and still feel like I'm one of them. It's such a weird feeling to already be a sophomore in college and in my own digs, and I think that thought sort of freaked me out last night when my parents left. This time, I'm REALLY on my own. Independence is such a scary thing to have, and I guess in a dorm it didn't really feel like all that big of a deal since there was an RA constantly checking up on everyone and a roomie to keep you company. Now I'm in an apt by myself and while it is fun to do literally whatever I want (walking around naked is a plus I quite enjoy...tmi?) it's still a daunting thing to get used to. We'll see how I handle it over the next few weeks!
Happy first week of school (to CSU students and the lucky few who are starting early with me)!
Madi
Trying to get my life together.
Wednesday, August 15, 2012 § 0
Between balancing a video blog for my school newspaper, moving into my new apartment, packing for said apartment, and moving my sister to Colorado, it's been awfully hard to vlog lately.
I will tell you, it's been quite an eventful few weeks and I guarantee that the upcoming weeks will be just as stressful. But stressful in a good way, if that makes any sense at all. Stressful busy, stressful accomplished, stressful independent.
The only bad part of these last few weeks has been my lovable junk-heap of a car. It was my first car, a lovely old 1990 Volvo, and I've had it for the past 3 years, driving it between states and to school and with my windows down with music blaring and up and fogging with the cold. It's been good to me.
That is, except for lately. It's been smelling of gas every time I drive it and last week, when I was nearly in the middle of an intersection, it shut off without any sort of warning, leaving me stranded in a turn lane. This scares me, if you can imagine, mostly because my dad looked it over and thought he fixed the problem but the uncertainty carries between us both.
So, we thought it was fine, for now. Then today, I try to turn it on and I discover the battery is flat dead. No lights were left on, nothing was plugged in where it shouldn't have been, nada. A mystery. And this is the second time it's died in two weeks.
I'm nervous because if I get a job that's not walking distance from my apartment this semester, I'm going to have a big need for a car. Especially since my parents live two hours away from campus and I tend to like to drive down to visit them.
UGH. This car. So lovable but so unreliable.
I will tell you, it's been quite an eventful few weeks and I guarantee that the upcoming weeks will be just as stressful. But stressful in a good way, if that makes any sense at all. Stressful busy, stressful accomplished, stressful independent.
The only bad part of these last few weeks has been my lovable junk-heap of a car. It was my first car, a lovely old 1990 Volvo, and I've had it for the past 3 years, driving it between states and to school and with my windows down with music blaring and up and fogging with the cold. It's been good to me.
That is, except for lately. It's been smelling of gas every time I drive it and last week, when I was nearly in the middle of an intersection, it shut off without any sort of warning, leaving me stranded in a turn lane. This scares me, if you can imagine, mostly because my dad looked it over and thought he fixed the problem but the uncertainty carries between us both.
So, we thought it was fine, for now. Then today, I try to turn it on and I discover the battery is flat dead. No lights were left on, nothing was plugged in where it shouldn't have been, nada. A mystery. And this is the second time it's died in two weeks.
I'm nervous because if I get a job that's not walking distance from my apartment this semester, I'm going to have a big need for a car. Especially since my parents live two hours away from campus and I tend to like to drive down to visit them.
UGH. This car. So lovable but so unreliable.
All packed up!
Thursday, August 2, 2012 § 0
And ready to move into my apartment tomorrow! I am so excited, and I've been jangling my new keys in everyone's face lately:
It's a small place but I can't wait to spruce it up and make it just for me.
And speaking of sprucing it up...my Goodwill obsession has only become more and more intense. I CAN'T GET ENOUGH OF THIS CHEAP-ASS SECONDHAND STUFF! I even got this gorgeous fabric that I'm going to use as a table runner on top of my white crochet tablecloth:
Crazy gorgeous floral!!! Lately, I've been all about the flowers.
Another amazing thing about this week was that my best friend stopped by to pay me a visit. It was so amazing having her here and I miss her already...whether we're spending two hours on the highway or 15 minutes on a go-cart speedway, we're always having fun with each other.
Love that girl!!!
Well, it's disappointing that summer's almost over but I've got a feeling that this year is going to be my best yet.
SHANNON, THIS IS OUR YEAR!!!
Adios,
Madi
How to get overly excited about a tea kettle.
Saturday, July 14, 2012 § 0
Hey, remember this blog post when I talked about the Paula Deen tea kettle I've been lusting after for my new apartment?
WELLLL....
WELLLL....
I know, it's a very ordinary purchase, but it's all mine, and it's bringing me one step closer to the move-in day. I CAN'T WAIT.
I've been making ordinary purchases all over the place- a bathroom rug, a shower curtain, plates, bookshelves- and yet, each purchase is like a new puppy. I freak out. I don't know what it is about the looming joy of complete independence, but I like it a whole lot. Especially compared to the way I felt around this time last summer, which included panic, fear, distress, and general discomfort.
It's so nice to have that out of the way.